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Feb. 11th, 2010

kenny

Today in therapy...

Today in therapy, I decided it was time to talk about my grandpa. This is the third therapist I've had, and I have never had a hard time talking about it before.

But today, I started bawling and stuttering, and it was really fucking hard to talk about. You'd think after 8 years, I'd be okay.

It's just kind of baffling, I guess

Feb. 4th, 2010

kenny

Movin' On...

I'm getting sick of writing fan fiction. I rarely read fan fiction anymore. I don't know, I'm bored of it. I won't make a career out of writing by writing about MCR fucking each other, and it sure as hell won't get me any brownie points in the music industry. With the way I want my life to go, it seems like a lose-lose situation.

There are some original stories I've been writting, just as fucked up and angsty and dark and weird as my fan fics. I also have been twisting around some of my best (meaning crazy/sexual/shoot me in the face cos this is way too weird stories) into originals. There's one problem with this though:

It's gotten hard enough to get people to read my fan fics. No one on LJ seems to read originals, and I'm an attention whore. I gain my confidence to keep writing by getting reviews from other people-- otherwise, how the hell do I know if my stores are good, how I can improve...

I just don't really know where to go. If there are any decent original communities around here (aka the ones that aren't cluttered with shitty vampire fics, where all the creative stories are otherwise ignored..), or if there are any awesome sites to go to... I don't know. Help would be awesome.

This doesn't mean that I'm completely done with fan fics either. I've promised a lot of people I'd write them stories, and while I probably won't get around to some of them ever, I'd like to try knocking a few off the list before LJ is forgotten about and dies. Cos, uh...I think it's happening. Just saying.

ANNNNYWAY. If you sat through my rant, thank you. If you have any advice/linkage for me, thank you even more. You will recieve invisible internet brownies. If you totally disregard this entire blog because I'm a fucking retard, you can go play in traffic.

Thank you, and goodnight.

Aug. 28th, 2009

kenny

Over The Ocean

Title: Over The Ocean
Author: howxixdisappear
Pairing: Gerard Way/Frank Iero
Prompt: Ocean
Rating: PG
Summary: Go home. Go home. Go home.
Disclaimer: Once upon a time, a baby was dropped on her head. Years later, she wrote stories about the boys in MCR having sex with each other. This is one of those stories. Enjoy.
Warnings: A bit of angst, fluff
Author's Note: This fic was written for aghostsvoice. Because I'm all about self-pimpage, my prompt table where I am accepting story requests can be found here ---> http://howxixdisappear.livejournal.com/28732.html My challenge prompt can be found here: http://howxixdisappear.livejournal.com/30988.html Check. It. Out.

Bring back my Frankie to me...Collapse )

Aug. 27th, 2009

green day bitch please

Restless Heart Syndrome

Title: Restless Heart Syndrome
Author: howxixdisappear
Pairing: Billie Joe Armstrong/Gerard Way
Prompt: Reminisce
Rating: PG-13/R
Summary: Being a rock star isn't all that it's cracked up to be...
Disclaimer: Once upon a time, a baby was dropped on her head. Years later, she wrote stories about the boys in MCR having sex with each other. This is one of those stories. Enjoy.
Warnings: Language, sexual themes
Author's Note: This fic was written for westboundgirl. It's my first fic involving Green Day... hope this is okay! Because I'm all about self-pimpage, my prompt table where I am accepting story requests can be found here ---> http://howxixdisappear.livejournal.com/28732.html My challenge prompt can be found here: http://howxixdisappear.livejournal.com/30988.html Check. It. Out.


I am my own worst enemy.Collapse )

Aug. 20th, 2009

wanna bite

Sing It To The Tune Of Faggot

Title: Sing It To The Tune Of Faggot
Author: howxixdisappear
Pairing: Mikey/Frank
Prompt: Fag
Rating: HARD R
Summary: "I'm not a fag, you know."
Disclaimer: Once upon a time, a baby was dropped on her head. Years later, she wrote stories about the boys in MCR having sex with each other. This is one of those stories. Enjoy.
Author's Note: This fic was written for and beta-ed by A FUCKING BITCH. The title was stolen from "Faggot" by Mindless Self Indulgence. Because I'm all about self-pimpage, my prompt table where I am accepting story requests can be found here ---> http://howxixdisappear.livejournal.com/28732.html My challenge prompt can be found here: http://howxixdisappear.livejournal.com/30988.html Check. It. Out.


I've Been Denied All The Best Ultra-Sex.Collapse )

Jul. 31st, 2009

kenny

My Angel [[standalone]]

Title: My Angel
Author: howxixdisappear
Pairing: Gerard/Frank
Word Count: 1,449
Prompt: Hallucinate
Rating: PG-13
Summary: It all started when the boy from Newark moved to my neighborhood. The boy with the angel face.
Disclaimer: Not real.
Author's Note: This fic was written for whatweneversaid, who NEEDS TO WRITE MORE HERSELF DAMMIT. Beta-ed by my wonderful girlfriend psychicfeeling. Because I'm all about self-pimpage, my prompt table where I am accepting story requests can be found here ---> http://howxixdisappear.livejournal.com/28732.html


Gerard is the perfect name for an angel.Collapse )

May. 24th, 2009

kenny

Paper Hearts [5 Frerard Drabbles]

Author's Notes: Five drabbles written for psychicfeeling. One fluff, four angst. Hope you like it.

Title: Eternity
Author: howxixdisappear
Pairing: Gerard/Frank
Word Count: 211 Words
Rating: PG
Summary: Even in the winter, when the heat wasn’t working and they didn’t have the proper attire to battle the cold, he was happy in that little old van.
Disclaimer: Not real.

Prompt: Engaged.Collapse )


Title: Mary Jane
Author: howxixdisappear
Pairing: Gerard/Frank
Word Count: 145 Words
Rating: PG-13
Summary: And I'll always be second best
Disclaimer: Not real.

Prompt: Stoned.Collapse )

Title: Murder City
Author: howxixdisappear
Pairing: Gerard/Frank
Word Count: 207 Words
Rating: R
Summary: The raven-haired whore adds it to his list. The body count grows, full of men who deserved it. Men who dwelled among the City of the Damned.
Disclaimer: Not real.

Prompt: Dirt.Collapse )


Title: Goodbye Is No Good
Author: howxixdisappear
Pairing: Gerard/Frank, Gerard/Mikey
Word Count: 280 Words
Rating: R
Summary: They both knew Frank allowed it. He got lazy. He got depressed. And Gerard was lonely. But that doesn’t stop Frank from being angry, for being jealous.
Disclaimer: Not real.

Prompt: Argument.Collapse )


Title: Take It Away
Author: howxixdisappear
Pairing: Gerard/Frank,
Word Count: 193 Words
Rating: PG
Summary: But after the crash, the fun was gone. After that accident, it was all gone.
Disclaimer: Not real.

Prompt: Amnesia.Collapse )

Apr. 15th, 2009

kenny

.Trust Me.

Title: .Trust Me.
Author: howxixdisappear
Pairing: Gerard/Frank
Rating: PG-13
Summary: "He clutched my hand and heaved his last breath, his last words- "I trust you."
Disclaimer: Not real.
Author Notes: Just a short story I wrote after MCA testing today to break my writers block. There are more [[and much longer]] fics on the way. =]


The World Is UglyCollapse )

Feb. 13th, 2009

kenny

Serendipity [[5]]

Title: Serendipity
Author: howxixdisappear
Pairing: Gerard/Mikey, Gerard/Frank
Rating: R
Summary: Therapy was thrown in. The invasion of his thoughts and feelings felt more like rape then having that man touching him did.
Disclaimer: Not real.
Author Notes: Sorry about the long wait. I've actually had most of this chapter written out for months and just didn't know how to finish it. I finally bullshitted my way through and here we are. =]
Warnings: Incest. Language. Attempted suicide. Death.
My Valentine Has Hollow Eyes
It Can't Rain All The Time
Like Angels On Fire
Slowly Turning Grey

I'm Not That Kind of GuyCollapse )
Tags:

Dec. 14th, 2008

kenny

Oh! The Places You Will Go!

Title: Oh! The Places You Will Go!
Author: howxixdisappear
Rating: PG-13
Summary: My therapist said that admitting your problems was the first step.
Disclaimer: Once upon a time, a baby was dropped on her head. Years later, she started making up stories about My Chemical Romance making sweet gay love to each other. This is one of those stories.

I think we need more beer.Collapse )

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