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bert puke

Laundry Day

Title: Laundry Day [1/?]
Author: howxixdisappear
Pairing: Bert McCracken/Quinn Allman
Rating: PG-13
Summary: To say the least, your first kiss was anticlimactic, and it tasted like ass.
Disclaimer: This is completely true. No, honestly. It is.
Warnings: Naked Quinn. The worst kiss imaginable. Powerpuff Girls.
Author's Note: Remember how I said that I was done with fan fiction? I think I lied. This is a series of not-quite-drabbles, and I have yet to decide if the title will have anything at all to do with the story. I just used it because I don't have any clean clothes. Enjoy.




To say the least, your first kiss was anticlimactic, and it tasted like ass. More specifically, morning breath, stale cigarettes, and old pizza, all rolled up and being shoved in your mouth at once. That’s the only way you can really describe what ass-kisses are like. Oh. And you’re in the bathtub.

Leave it to Bert McCracken to interrupt your private time because he’s suddenly decided that he’s lonely or in love with you or something. It’s not exactly the scenario you pictured in your head when you lie awake at night, trying not to feel like a stupid teenaged girl when you wish that he would sweep you off your feet. No. It’s not anything like that. It’s wet, it’s stinky and tastes bad and it’s really kind of gross, and immediately after he’s done raping your tonsils with his tongue, he straightens himself back up and leaves.

He forgets to shut the door behind him, leaving it wide open for anyone to see you naked. In the midst of your fucking bubble bath.

Needless to say, that was hands down the most disappointing moment of your life. To make things better, your mother walks past the bathroom just as you’re scrambling out of the tub and clumsily trying to wrap yourself up in this little Power Puff Girls towel. She makes a face and shouts, “Goddammit, Quinn, shut the door next time!”

Awesome.

Comments

OH KEEP GOING WITH THIS IT IS A GOOD IDEA.
Thank you! More will come soon...hopefully
LoL. Geez. And I thought my Batman towel was the shit. Of course Quinnifer has to go prove me wrong.

But yes, PLEASE continue and soon. I can't wait to see what happens!
Hahaha. Batman towels are still bad ass though.

Thank youuuu
Thank youuu, more will come soon
Relevant to my interests. More? :3
Yay relevance! More will come soon, unless I forget.
MORE! NOW!
I mean...please.
=D
I saw The Used last night...
Quinn looks so old...
And Bert looks like an old little kid. And Jeph just looked depressed. And Dan...I couldn't even see his face, he has soo much hair.
But I like this<3333
(Hey, I was at that show too!)
Were you really?!
Do you like, live around Albany?
Hell yeah I was! :D
But naw, I live all the way over in Buffalo, sadly.
Oh, alrighty.
So what did you think of the new Chiodos singer?
Yeah :c
And I liked him! But I have a friend who is a diehard of Craig so I might have to go with the original always being the best. Even if new guy is cute.
Oh yeah, Craig is obviously better. But I thought the new dude was pretty good.
Thank youuuu.

Aww, poor Quinn. He's apparently sick though, and probably worn out from touring and shit... and, yknow. From being... old.

Was the show still good? I'm going to see them on Sunday...for the first time, despite me being a fan since I was 13. -facepalm-
The show was very very very good.
I mean, I'm not the hugest Used fan, but they were pretty good. Good at getting the crowd going.
=D
Oh my god this is adorable. More please.
Thank you! More soooon, I hope.
Poor Quinn *giggles*

It's awesome so far!
*dances on your face*

Thank youuu

nice drabble

it reminds me of a f/g i read the other day
the awkwardness i guess
good job
oh my god, I love this already
thanks! more will come soon
Squee! more?